I just had a birthday pass and despite the obvious reasons of why a woman who is 29+ wouldn’t want to see another year come and go, I also have a habit of judging my life based on some mythical calendar of events. Married by 25, check, baby by 28, check, career by 30, check, millionaire by 35. Uh, I must have been absent that day, can I get a make up test? But seriously, how many of us are guilty of judging our success in life by some timeline of when everything is supposed to happen? And if we don’t measure up to something, say you didn’t marry until after 30, then we’re abnormal, defective, or even BEHIND. It’s time to unplug from that lie!

I could take up this entire blog naming all the people that didn’t do things in the order that other people said they should to be normal. I am beginning to wonder what this “normal” really is, because I haven’t met one person yet who lines up to that definition. Who are these people making these rules for us in the first place? You never hear who they really are, you just hear people say things like, “Well, you know what ‘they’ say?” Who are “they”? I have a sneaky suspicion that “they” aren’t really all that cool anyway and here we have been worried about what “they” think all of our lives. Well not me, “they” can shove it!

Some of you may have already unplugged from what society thinks of you but you have still given your life decisions over to someone else’s idea of what you should be. Maybe it’s a church or a group of friends that have become the new measuring stick for your life. No matter who it is setting the standard for your life, if it’s not your own heart you have missed the mark. I met a woman recently who has always home schooled her children, everyone in her “world” also home schools their children. She has a child that now wants to go to school and she is torn on what to do. Go with your gut is my advice, God gave you that child, not some secret society of home schoolers, you know that child better than anyone else, follow after peace in your heart and do what you feel is right for your family.

Don’t get me wrong there are a lot of great teachers who have been put in your life to help you really get the most out of it, but when they start saying things like “you always should” or “you can’t” start running in the other direction. This thing isn’t one size fits all, it’s great to teach people tools they can use to better their own personal journey but once they start telling you how to live day in and day out that’s where you have to draw the line. Those are decisions that you are supposed to make yourself.

I have decided to live my life according to a master time line, one that isn’t controlled by society, my peers or even my own family’s ideas of success. A timeframe that has been mapped out specifically for me and nobody else. It’s my timeline, my one and only life, and I’m gonna go with my heart on how to live it. Stop allowing others and yourself to put limitations on your life.

The bottom line is this, we need to stop getting our cues from others and start getting them from that little voice inside that tells us who we really are. Go with your own flow! I remember when I was a little kid and I was on a cheerleading squad. I didn’t want to be a cheerleader but I felt pressure to do what all the other girls my age were doing. I was already about 5’5” at 10 years old and as coordinated as a new born giraffe, not a pretty sight. We had this one cheer where at the end we were supposed to do a little dance of our own choosing. Well, all the other girls chose to do something very similar and safe but I just did whatever came “naturally” to me. I am sure it looked like a train wreck to all the other lemmings watching, but I didn’t care! Make a decision not to care what “they” think and start caring what “you” think. I guarantee it’s one of the biggest steps towards becoming the “real you.”

I leave you with one of my favorite quotes, "And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music."

Dance, baby, dance!!